1. Be clear in your mind that they need medication, therapy and make allowances for this.

Encourage them to continue both. Make it clear it’s now the new routine.

  1. There should be Guide Dogs for the Depressed.

If the sufferer doesn’t have a dog or cat, and especially if he or she lives alone, encourage them to have a well-trained, easy to manage, older animal.

  1. Make any decision you can for other person.

In other words, don’t say “Would you like to go out for dinner tonight? Where would you like to go? Say instead, “I want to take you out tomorrow for dinner. I’ll pick you up at 7.pm”

  1. Speak in normal, modulated tones.

Avoid the patronising overly compassionate look of concern and tone of voice. If they have trouble deciding or remembering something, keep your eyes from looking concerned or worried, because that will only add to their worry and confusion.

  1. Just be with them.

Don’t hover, try to cheer them up, or try and get them to “talk about it” Their mind is adjusting and processes are slowed and emotionally, they’re in conflict. Under those circumstances, its difficult to talk or to maintain eye contact.

  1. Expect dysfunction, be pleased with small steps.

Perfectionism is part of the cause of depression. Help the individual start breaking the cycle. 70% will return to pre-depressed state functioning with time and treatment.

  1. Don’t put them in a solution that would arouse and demand emotion.

Celebrations, holidays, receiving gifts, or a heated discussion of politics all require a level of involvement the depressed person is not capable of.

8. Be grounded and stay centered yourself. Remind yourself of your love for them that will endure “even this”.

9. When the person begins to heal is a wonderful time for them to have a coach or therapist.

 Life Coaches and therapists can be an extremely important member of the healing team when the client begins to function again and move forward.

 Buy one of these books – give one to the depressed person to read and read another yourself. (We recommend – “The Happiness Trap”)

The Happiness Trap: How to Stop Struggling and Start Living: A Guide to ACT (Paperback)
by Russ Harris

Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (Paperback)
by Steven C. Hayes

The Reality Slap: Finding Peace and Fulfilment When Life Hurts (Paperback)
by Russ Harris

The Confidence Gap (Paperback)
by Russ Harris

 ACT on Life Not on Anger: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy Guide to Problem Anger (Paperback)
by Georg H. Eifert

ACT with Love: Stop Struggling, Reconcile Differences, and Strengthen Your Relationship with Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (Paperback)
by Russ Harris

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